The Difference Between Being Normal and Being Too "Funny"

Just watching “The Office” tonight and, of course, learned a lesson on how not to be suave from the hilarious character of Michael Scott.

The lesson I gleamed tonight: The Power of Being Normal

For those who haven’t seen it, the joke is that Michael Scott (Steve Carell) is a ridiculously socially unaware guy, one of those way-too-extraverted salespeople who grates on you. Anyways, he has a couple of phone calls with women lined up.

Pam, his receptionist, tells him that he has Carol his realtor on the line. Michael answers in his typically over-the-top mode, “Hey Carol, how is the real estate business going? Is it real good?”

But it’s still Pam on the line. She informs the camera that she gives Michael a “practice run” when greeting people on the phone. His first tries at greeting people are usually terrible, but she says his second one is much improved.

When she patches Carol in to Michael, he just greets her naturally. “Hey, Carol.” That type of thing.

We see it happen again with Jan Levinson-Gould. Pam tells Michael she’s on the line and Michael breaks into his over-the-top persona: “Jan Levinson I presuuuume?!” Pam says, “still me, Michael,” and patches Jan through. Michael just says “Hey, Jan, how’s it going?”

The point here? Michael thought he was being funny and original because he was outside the box. But really he was just being obnoxious and making greetings way harder than they had to be. It was an improvement to start greeting people in a more natural, casual way.

When guys talk to women, they make the same mistake Michael Scott makes. They think “I’m not attractive enough by myself, I have to try to entertain her or else she’ll realize how unattractive I am.” They overcompensate. They go over the top.

People sense that. They know you’re trying to win them over with your theatrics. They wish you could just be normal.

For more people than we’d like to admit, just being normal is a big improvement. Focus on improving your confidence, how relaxed you are, your style, how social you are - but don’t become an entertainer. That’s “putting her on a pedestal” behavior.

Be normal. Act like you’re already in the club. Your results will be much better.

And watch the Office, it’s a great show.